Twenty-three year old Susan Garner is a teacher (and also a swimmer) who is not immune to compliments from certain male students. On her first day at work, one student, Arthur, invites her to go swimming in his pool, and even offers to take color movies of her. Susan thinks this is a wonderful idea. She gives Arthur pointers on his swimming technique. And he convinces her to take her bathing suit off. "'I better go swimming now,' she said. 'That's what we are supposed to be doing, isn't it?'" (page 20). The most troubling aspect of this, of course, is that she is clearly an idiot, and no one wants idiots teaching our children, not even teaching them swimming.
It takes only a few encouraging words before Susan has Arthur's penis in her mouth. "Embraced, in the warmth of his thighs, Susan felt secure and happy" (page 25). Certainly she must have felt her job was secure. "And as far as Arthur was concerned, the sexy teacher's mouth was the most perfect resting place for his penis in the world" (page 25). But would it be his penis' final resting place? Susan immediately becomes emotionally attached to Arthur. He tells her, "Knock it off... I don't go for sentimental crap. You want another fuck?" (page 30).
At work, she is asked to teach something called the Pregnancy Class, that is teaching the students who have become pregnant. The vice principal tells her, "Year after year the same girls are getting pregnant" (page 36). Really? There are only four years in high school, so are we to believe that certain girls have four children by graduation? That must be exhausting.
Marvin enters her classroom, demanding oral sex. After all, she did it for his buddy Arthur, so it really wouldn't be fair for her to turn Marvin away. Teachers shouldn't show any favoritism. Marvin demands another date, so she writes down her address and phone number. When Marvin shows up that night, she becomes upset: "She was angry as hell, even though she knew she probably had to be his unwilling victim" (pages 48-49). Because if you know you have to be someone's victim, there is no reason to be angry. And so she has a great time, and suddenly is emotionally attached to Marvin too, asking him what his plans are after high school.
The gym teacher later hits on her, asking her about her dinner plans. She tells him, "I plan to eat a solitary meal by myself" (page 67). But he talks to her for another thirty seconds, and she begins to like him, and they go off to a bar. Does no ever mean no with this girl? Not that she needs to be wooed, but the gym teacher sweet talks her a bit: "And, honey, you've got a pair of knockers on you that won't stop" (page 72). What happens if they do suddenly stop? Author Mary Pearson never tells us.
After they have sex, the gym teacher tells her, "This is what sex is all about...Not having kids. But enjoying it." She doesn't bother to tell him she had two kids earlier.
Arthur and Marvin pay Susan a visit for a threesome, and soon "Their bodies were merging in a total sex situation" (page 100). I had one of those total sex situations a while back, but I took care of it. "She reached up and massaged one buttock while licking the other. Finishing one, she moved to the other. When she had licked both of his buttocks, she pulled on his penis" (page 112). That signals that she's finished. In England, pulling on the penis signals the maid that it's time to serve tea. That's a tip for any of you thinking of doing a bit of traveling next year.
Susan gets a new student in her class, and immediately imagines having sex with him. So she writes down her address and phone number for him, though by now you'd think it would be posted in the boys' bathroom. The new student, Bill, visits Susan. "Her mouth was engulfed with Bill's cock, and it was difficult to breathe. Yet there was something wonderful about it. It was total communication" (page 131). That is nice, as most people need to work on their communication skills.
She has a great time with Bill, but the next day she takes a shine to Ron, who is whispering during class. She tells him she has to discipline him with a paddle. (No matter how much I misbehaved during class, no teacher ever said that to me, and for that I am forever sad.) At one point later on, another student enters her classroom to ask about his grades, and Susan manages not to have sex with him. She is quite proud of herself for holding back. But she probably ought to do a bit of teaching at some point. After all, the vice principal is upset that she hasn't put any interesting displays on her bulletin boards.
Later, when Susan is going down on one of her students at home, the vice principal suddenly enters her bedroom and tells her, "I guess you're not as good a teacher as I thought you were" (page 185). And that's pretty much the end of that. But I do wish someone would explain to me what the author means by "the fir-trimmed triangle around her crotch" (page 93). A triangle trimmed with bark, perhaps?
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